Friday, 23 September 2016

Literacy Homework due Friday, 30th September

Literacy Homework due Friday, 30th September

Have a look at this boring list poem.

In the blue dream jar you might find:

a parrot,
a butterfly,
the sea,
the sky,
a precious stone,
a gift.




How can you improve it? Maybe you could add some exciting adjectives (gargantuan, ferocious) or some powerful verbs (pounced, erupted). You could include some alliteration (the menacingmonster was munching his meaty meal) or a simile (its skin was a cold as ice, it crawled like a snail).

Write your own, improved version of the poem. I can't wait to see what you come up with!

21 comments:

  1. ADITYA
    a peaceful parrot singing a tune gracefully as an angel,
    a beautiful butterfly sitting on a branch as quite as a mouse,
    the blue sea washing against the sand,
    the bright,blue sky shining on the smooth ground,
    a small precious stone relaxing on the seashore
    a giant gift was laying on the corner of the room.

    ReplyDelete
  2. In a blue dream jar you might find :

    rainbow parrot flying to to blue sky ,
    magnificent butterfly resting on top of the blue sea,
    as well as precious, beautiful stone shinning like gold
    being a brilliant present for my Mum.

    ReplyDelete
  3. A large and colourful parrot is flying like wind,
    A tiny and delicate butterfly is floating like a feather,
    The greenish blue sea is shiny and sparkling,
    The light blue sky is clear and bright,
    A solid, glittering and precious stone is like a gift from Mother Nature.

    By Kashvi

    ReplyDelete
  4. Be a beautiful butterfly and spread your wings, loveing and free. Bright and colourful for the world to see.
    Some can fly higher than others, but each one files the best.
    Why compare one to another?
    Each one is special.
    Each one is different.
    Each one is beautiful.



    In the blue dream jar you might find :
    A beautiful butterfly beginning to open its wings, beautiful butterfly fluttering by, beautiful butterfly, up in the sky, beautiful butterfly, lovely to see, please pretty butterfly by me.

    ReplyDelete
  5. in the blue dream jar you might find: a gleaming blue parrot flying across the sensationally bright sky,a set of diamonds sparkling in the moonlight, the sea also joined in the party, as it crashed and splashed like a dolphin.Cutting the air like a hot knife through butter,a scintillating blue jet darting through the air,the sky lifted with sadness as it rained down tears flooding the arid town below giving it supplies and life.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Emily
    In the blue dream jar you might find:
    The sky is as blue as the sea,
    the gargantuan sea scattering ferociously across the beach,
    a precious stone as glamourous as a star,
    a petrifying parrot perching stiffly on a tree branch,
    a dancing butterfly fluttering faboulously,
    a speacial gift as colourful as a flower.

    ReplyDelete
  7. In the blue dream jar you can find:

    A prickly parrot sitting on a oak tree,

    a bizzar looking butterfly fluttering its wings,

    the shinning sea of golden flowers,

    the sun-setting sky,

    as sparkling precious stone,

    a Gods gift.

    ReplyDelete
  8. In the blue dream jar you might find:
    a scarlet parrot that squawks very loud
    a butterfly that flutters fast and proud
    a glittering sea filled with dolphins and sharks
    a bright blue sky that will soon turn dark
    an extraordinary emerald dazzling green
    a dinosaur gift for Tom the best I have seen

    ReplyDelete
  9. Armaan

    In my blue dream jar you can find:

    a colourful butterfly dancing around the flower

    I saw a parrot swooping across my garden

    I saw a white sea of doves near the beach

    I saw a blue cloudy sky in my dreams

    there was a shinny glowing stone in the river

    and this all was a gift from santa

    ReplyDelete
  10. Armaan

    In my blue dream jar you can find:

    a colourful butterfly fluttering around my trampoline

    there is a red parrot swooping passed my garden

    I could see a white see of doves near the beach

    there was a blue cloudy sky in my dreams

    there was a shinny, glowing, precious stone hanging from my pocket

    Santa gave us all a glamorous gift

    ReplyDelete
  11. In the blue dream jar you might find:

    - a colorful parrot who is sitting on a tree,
    - a fluttering butterfly who is flying around,
    - a beautiful smelling flower who is growing in the grass,
    - the shining sun, which is sunrising,
    - a rainbow unicorn who is flying around the sky,
    - an invisible lizard, who is walking along the palm.

    ReplyDelete
  12. In the blue dream jar you might find:
    a powerful parrot walking on a tree,
    a colourful butterfly as colourful as a rainbow,
    the wide sea ,
    the bright sky ,
    the glittering precious stone from the museum,
    a gift very beautiful with just a touch of magic .

    ReplyDelete
  13. 27\9\2016

    Mina

    In the blue dream jar you might find:

    A peaceful parrot was flying as gracefully as a bird,
    A beautiful butterfly fluttering its wings like a fish’s fin,
    The storming sea was roaring like an angry lion,
    The sparkling sky was as shiny as a shooting star,
    A perfect precious stone broke into pieces,
    A great gift of life as beautiful as cosmos

    ReplyDelete
  14. In the blue dream jar you can find
    A coularful parrot flying to his home
    A preshos buterfly flaping his wings
    A big blue sea at the beach
    A big blue sky as still as a stone
    A big gift wayting to bee unrapt
    A preshos stone on top of a golden ring
    By Denis

    ReplyDelete
  15. In the blue dream jar you can find:

    A prickly parrot sitting on a oak tree,

    a bizzar looking butterfly fluttering its wings,

    the shinning sea of golden flowers,

    the sun - setting sky,

    as sparkling precious stone,

    a Gods gift.

    ReplyDelete
  16. In the blue dream jar,you can find:a pretty parrot perched on a tree,

    a beautiful butterfly as light as a petal ,

    a glimmering sea as blue as a blue-whale,

    a glamorous sky as cool as a sports car,

    a precious stone as sparkly as gold,

    a incredible gift as pure as sun-light.

    ReplyDelete
  17. In the blue dream jar you can find:

    A gleaming parrot,

    A beautiful blue butterfly,

    The wavy sea,

    The blue remarkable sky,

    A precious stone as hard as rock,

    A gods gift



    ReplyDelete
  18. Nithilan -
    In the blue dream jar you will find :
    A precious parrot in the calming breeze,
    a beautiful butterfly in the gleaming sky,
    the rolling sea filled with fishes and people,
    the spectacular sky brightening every morning,
    a precious stone as smooth as silk,
    a great gift from god

    ReplyDelete
  19. In the blue dream jar you can find:

    A purple parrot flying fast as a plane
    A caterpillar slowly turning into a beautiful butterfly
    The sea was snoring like a old man
    The sky was shining brightly
    A lonely precious stone in the sea
    A gift, I didn't know about

    ReplyDelete
  20. Gurjaipaul
    In the blue dream jar you can find:

    A small parrot flying over a tree,
    A beautiful butterfly flying over the flower
    The wonderful sea is the place to relax ,
    The pretty sky has lots of clouds,
    A precious crystal stone lying on the playground,
    A secret gift wrapped on the table.

    ReplyDelete
  21. In the blue dream jar you might find:
    A powerful parrot as colourful as the rainbow,
    A beautiful butterfly as orange as a tiger,
    The super sea as blue as the dragonfly's coated stones,
    The shinnig sky as shiny as the bright sun,
    A precious stone as glossy as gold,
    A gifty gify as pouncy as a trampoline.

    ReplyDelete